CC called the day after the mediocre date, though my sucktacular phone service just went straight to voicemail. CC then called the next day and also texted to make sure that I got the voicemail. I called him back and we chatted for a bit, and he asked if I’d like to have dinner the next night because it was the only night he had free before I left to go back to Michigan for Christmas. I said sure… again, a girl’s gotta’ eat.
The next day when we made plans, the two options he gave me for dinner were a diner or a pizza place. After consulting with my co-workers about the quality of the pizza and receiving the response that the pizza was pretty good but the atmosphere was “less than romantic”, I texted back that pizza sounded great.
The pizza place was one where you place your order at the counter and then go sit down and they bring the pizza out to you. CC and I discussed which toppings we liked on pizza and decided to go with the house special.
CC: “We’ll take a small house special.”
CC: Turning to me, “Wait, do you think that will be enough?”
Jen: Incredulously and out loud, “Um, no.”
CC: “You’re right. Ok, we’ll take a medium house special.”
Jen: Silently in head - “WHAT??? The large!!! The large is like $1 more than the medium. Who doesn’t order the large pizza??? If I was ordering a pizza for just myself I would order the large. Pizza leftovers are hardly leftovers at all, they practically taste just the same as the original meal. WHO DOESN’T ORDER THE LARGE????!!!!”
Middle of date: insert random and mundane mediocrity here.
End of date: Jen has eaten her half of the medium pizza. CC has eaten all but one piece. CC gets up to leave.
Jen: “Aren’t you going to take that.”
CC: Without even a moment of hesitation, “I don’t have a dog.”
Jen: “Um, what?”
CC: “I don’t have a dog.”
Jen: “I have no idea what that means.”
CC: “A dog. I don’t have a dog, so there is no reason to take home one piece of pizza.”
Jen: “First, I don’t have a dog either, but I’m pretty sure that dogs don’t and/or shouldn’t be eating pizza, so I still don’t understand how not having a dog is relevant. Second, I don’t understand why YOU wouldn’t eat the pizza.”
CC: “It’s not worth the effort for one piece, but you can take it if you want.”
Jen: “Ok, I will.” And I did. And it was totally worth the effort in that I had that and a salad for dinner the next night.
Conclusion: WTF is wrong with this guy and food? He barely orders anything, and then he never finishes the meal. He clearly misunderstands the concept of a “doggie bag”. I’m beginning to wonder if he also misunderstands the concept of sarcasm.
Follow-up: He clearly likes me, and I may go on a third mediocre date because, 1: I’m new in town and don’t know many people, 2: I want to see if the third time is a charm or whether the freakish food ordering continues, and 3: a girl’s gotta’ eat.
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